I have a fairly simple question. What ever happened to good old fashioned wit?
As I've made mention before in this blog, I am a fiction writer on top of being an over-opinionated semi-professional jackass. As a fiction writer I am shall we say more than observant of how people express themselves during a conversation. After all, it's almost impossible to create realistic characters if they are unable to sound like real people. No matter who you are or what you write, your characters must sound believable to get your audience to buy in and willingly suspend just enough of that disbelief to buy the next five or six of the books in the series (yes, I mean you Ms. Rowling). Unless of course your last name is Tolkien or Martin and you write epic fantasy with its own languages and mythologies, or you just think you can and that is a whole other matter. (Before anyone gets up in arms, yes I know there are Elvish and Klingon dictionaries and the like. My glasses just aren't quite that thick anymore. I got contacts and attempt to keep the true depths of my nerd cred somewhat private.)
As part of my casual, meaning when it catches my attention, study of the way in which we members of the herd express ourselves collectively, I've noticed something interesting. It occurs to me that we seem to be losing the art of general wit in our conversation. Worse yet, when presented with reparte at its most minimum, some of us seem to just resort to profanity as a retort and go on with our existence. My only question is why? Consider this example: I'm at the gym the other day and notice a young kid's rather flamboyant footwear. Okay, I'm being kind. This kid's Nikes looked like somebody let a horny gibbon loose in the leather storeroom with a bucket of paint, a raging erection, and bad intentions. Anyway, his friends were gathered around to watch this kid attempt to deadlift an amount of weight that for an adult male would have been considered embarassing but apparently among his tribe was somewhat heroic. One of his friends looked at him and said "Nice shoes, when did you mom say you had to give them back?" His reply, "F U." As I stood to the side putting plates away after I use them (it's really not difficult) I couldn't help but marvel at this numbskull's ineptitude. He couldn't have been more than 18. A simple "Anytime tonight after your mom finishes blowing me" or something otherwise juvenile and maternally insulting would have worked just fine. Instead, he not only lost some credibility among his peers but also appeared to have strained something trying to throw that 135 pounds in the air like his nut hair had actually started to grow.
We were all kids once, weren't we? Didn't we all learn how to trade insults and 'your mama' jokes? Granted some of us were better at it than others, but hey, we still all had the experience. Guess what boys and girls? Those little barb tossing sessions were the foundation for wit later in life. It just amazes me that we seem to be losing the art of conversation. When did we decide en masse to become the unarmed victim in the battle of wits? It's not as if we don't have daily examples of it in our lives. All you have to do is watch some of the better written television shows and you at least have somewhat of a guideline. Granted some of them get a little heavy handed with the wit on occasion, but in the overall they can still show you the way as it were. (To the writing staff of The Big Bang Theory: I'm sorry guys but honestly, I don't think that full comprehension of the nuances of string theory is necessary to execute every third joke. It helps, but I think you might be reaching to the minority audience. Granted I are that minority audience (grammatical flub intended Mr. Hunt, calm down) but still, ease back a little for the undereducated, okay?)
Do I think we should all carry on sparkling conversations full of wit, banter, and reparte on a consistent basis? No, we'd hurdle down the turnpike toward the ridiculous faster than Madonna's half time show. Is it necessary to interact with others in a way other than monosyllabic grunts and gestures? No, but according to my parents around about the time I was two years old I believe we are supposed to 'use our words.'
Now, what I am suggesting is something that may be a bit radical. Allow this to sink in for just a moment before you pass judgment.
I suggest we slow down just enough in our daily race to Oblivion (or Skyrim, or whatever else holds your current obsession) to actually care about engaging someone else in actual conversation. Have you ever stopped to consider how many people you actually talk to on a daily basis versus how many you communicate with via social media? I'll give you an example. When my wife and I decided to get married rather suddenly last week we called maybe ten people to personally let them know what was going on. Our collective Facebook announcements had well over fifty combined responses and the blog post regarding stories from our wedding had over one hundred page views within twenty four hours. We live in an age where a large number of us limit our discussions of any topic to 140 characters or less because that is all Twitter will allow per post. I have several friends that I used to talk to on the phone fairly regularly. As our lives became busier we trended toward the occasional email to catch each other up. Now I follow them on Twitter and feel like I know what's going on in their lives. It occurs to me that I know as much about what is really going on in my friends' lives as I do what happens daily for Nathan Fillion, who I find to be a good actor and funny as hell but have never actually met in person. Damned if the dude doesn't give good tweet though.
Simply put, actual conversation takes work. For those of you who are married, remember dating? You know, when you actually had to talk to someone before the possibility of seeing them naked was a given? (Okay for some of you that may not be the most pertinent example, but you know who you are you dirty little monkeys.) I have always maintained that not so attractive men can do just fine with the ladies as long as they are confident and learn to actually carry on a conversation. Maybe it's time that all of us, not just those of us trying to sell a novel, take a moment and pay attention to what someone else is saying. You never know, with a little practice, that sparkling wit we all used to know, have, and love may find its way back to the light of day and turn us once again into someone with whom another person may actually want to carry on a conversation.
No comments:
Post a Comment