Thoughts On Father's Day

500 Nerd Points if you get this Father's Day Reference

Happy Father's Day to all of the fathers out there.  It doesn't matter if you have had a child, adopted one, or found one in the smoking crater left by its spaceship, you deserve respect for taking on the responsibility of raising a small person.

I'm not yet a father, unless you count fur people in which case I'm on #4, 5 and 6 respectively.  My life as of yet just hasn't produced any little ones.  I joke sometimes and tack on the line "that I'm aware of" to that statement, but personally I think that would be the shock of the millenia to find out there was a kid running around out there that was my fault.  A recent article in the Raleigh News and Observer cited a recent study in which it was found that men who wait until their late thirties and early forties to father children are noted to live longer than those who father children earlier in life, specifically in their late teens and early twenties.  Considering I still want children and I'm almost 40, I must be planning to live to darn near 100 unless my wife and I get going pretty soon.  Then again, there's always Tony Randall as an example.  The man was changing diapers in his seventies.  And they say Viagra is mostly a recreational drug.

I'd like to think that since I began this blog last year I've been fairly upfront with voicing my opinions, for better, worse, or highly antagonistic, on whatever subject without feeling the need to sugar coat.  So, in honor of Father's Day, gentlemen, we need to have a talk.

[Before I even get started I know there are some of you out there that will immediately dismiss anything I have to say because I don't have a child yet and can't possibly know of what I speak.  On some issues, you're right, all I'm going on here is conjecture based on opinion.  However, without going into specific details I will say that I have more experience in the area than I let on...]

It's a beautiful day outside fellas, so pull up a metaphorical lawn chair, crack a beer, and let's hash this out in the back yard like men aught to when it comes to such things.  Boys, there are some of us that just suck at being fathers.  There's no nice way to put it.  Some of us are just bad dads.  The sad thing is, thoes of us that suck at this sacred task know it without being told.  Some of us not only don't have a clue on how to raise a family but could care less about trying to do so.  The hard fact is that there will always be those douche bag dads out there who think it's great to have multiple baby mamas spread out all over the map and treat their kids as an obligation instead of a gift.  It sucks but it's true.

Men, it's not really my intention today to lambast those dick tards.  They know who they are and even though that little voice in their head that screams at them to change is going hoarse on a regular basis, they're going to continue to be the shit stain parents they are and nothing we say or do will fix that.  So why are we talking, then?  Simply put, there is a good sized chunk of kids rolling around with no positive male influences in their lives.  None.  Zero.  Zip.  Nada.  This is a problem we can actually do something about!

Each and every person possessing male genitalia that reads this, father or not, most likely knows a child in their life with less than adequate paternal influence.  Fixing this problem and the horrific fallout it will eventually entail is a very simple matter.  Find a way to spend time with that kid.  Be an influence.  Be a role model.  If anything, listen to them.  Show them an adult that actually gives a damn about them.  If you don't have a kid like that in your life, there are a crap ton of organizations out there that are begging for you to be a volunteer. 

We all like to talk a lot about making the world a better place.  It starts, at least in my opinion, with putting better people on it to begin with and, contrary to what some seem to believe, better people start out as kids that need to be raised properly.  They don't just spring into existence!

Finally, I want to take a moment to acknowledge and say thank you to the three men who gave me good examples of what a father should be as I was growing up.  My father, David Pittman, and my grandathers J.B. Eason Jr. and Rupert Pittman.  Thank you, in this as in many other situations in this life, will never truly be enough.

Happy Father's Day.

One last note as a postscript to those of you that are shitty excuses for fathers and know it:  You have an opportunity, this very second, to change.  That child / those children look to you in ways none of us truly comprehend to give them a safe and happy home and to start them on their way in this world.  It's on you to make the change.  You were man enough to make that child.  Are you man enough to do right by them?